Reflections

School's opening on Tuesday, and of course, even though I tend to complain about the absolute boredom of holidays, I dread it.
It seems so long ago that we last had lessons, so long ago that I saw all my teachers, so long ago that we all gathered around our locker area and had our lunch.
Of course, if you add in the fact that we're probably gonna get back ALL our papers on Tuesday, there's no wonder why I do not exactly look forward to it.

I used to like getting papers back, its fun.
How we get to see whether the results really do reflect the amount of effort we put in, or lack thereof.
I always liked the sort of adrenaline rush, but somehow, it doesn't have the same effect here.
I don't feel much excitement getting the papers back, probably because I know I didn't put in the effort.
Maybe the teachers' attitude towards school work and everything has rubbed off on me.
As vv so eloquently put it, the "heck care" attitude.
I do not get the feeling that the teachers care about us.
Maybe I'm wrong in judging all teachers by the handful that I'm being taught by, but is that so?
They don't collect our work, they don't mark our work, regardless whether its class- or homework.
The only thing they mark is tests. Assignments. Those that actually "matter". Those of which the grades appear in our report.
At most, they just check that we have done them.
So what if we've done them?
Does that mean that we would not have mistakes?
Does that show that we have learnt the chapter?
No.
It only shows one thing.


That I bothered to write something down.


There was once, msP had asked us to do the Review Questions for chapter 3 in the book.
I had honestly forgotten, so I told her the truth.
She left my column in her record book blank - I had not done my work.
Later, I met a classmate in the library, and she said she too had forgotten about the homework.
However, she had, instead, shown her the questions that she had done for chapter 2 and the teacher had just glanced through, and ticked her name -She had done her work.
That just goes to prove what I'm saying.
msP didn't even READ what my classmate had written.
The only thing she cared about was the fact that we had written something.
Does that mean I could have just shown her some random piece of paper on which I had written some words, and she would have ticked my name?
What if it had not even been words relating to her subject?

The prospect of getting back our exam papers doesn't sound so exciting anymore.
Are they marking them just because they have to?


Maybe this is how uni is like.
Independent studying.
I have come to a stage where education is now a responsibility, not a right.
We're old enough, we should take responsibility for what we do.
The teachers do not need to be there to chase us for homework anymore, they shouldn't need to be checking that we do our work.
We have passed the stage where we do the homework just because the teachers ask us to.
By now, after 13 years of education, surely I have become... independent?